The relationship does not necessarily have to be with a lover--with minor modifications these same principles can be applied to family, friend, business partner, hairdresser, or acquaintance. For the purposes of instruction, however, the steps below do apply to a general type love relationship.

The first thing you must do is decide which relationship needs ending. This is very important. You don't want to inadvertently end a relationship by accident that should not have been. Once you have established who it is you want out of your life, you are ready to take the steps to do so.

Establish distance. If you live your current lover, this can be achieved as simply as moving to the couch or a guest bedroom. Ideally you should move in with a friends or new lover, but if not available then just getting yourself out of your soon to be former lover's bed is imperative. Note that this is not always as easy as it sounds. Most often, your lover will demand explanation (see Confess, below).

Confess. If you are cheating, and you probably are, tell your lover. Try to pick the most inopportune moment possible so that you will seem insensitive and callous. This is important, as your primary goal is to convince your current lover that you are not for them. Public places can have dual benefits: 1) your current lover is less inclined to make a scene and 2) will likely be incredulous that you actually took them out to tell them you are sleeping with someone else. Be explicit. Give details, and exaggerate if necessary. For example, if your cheating was only a minor indiscretion, such as kissing a stranger or calling a 900 number, tell them that you had sex with the other lover in the bed you share. They will generally see this as unforgivable. Often the confession of infidelity does the trick, your job may be over now--your current lover, if a reasonable person, will refuse to see you again.

Of course, if your current lover was reasonable, you wouldn't be looking for an out. When you are dealing with an unreasonable person, they may not see infidelity as reason for the relationship to be over. They may want to "work on it." They may want to attend couples counseling. Do not agree to do so. Move on to the next step.

Point out their faults. Tell your current lover everything that they do that annoys you. If you cannot think of anything, make something up. It helps to use physical attributes as well as personality traits, especially if it is something that they have no control over. For example, if he or she has red hair, tell them how hard it is to live with or date a redhead, because you have some innate aversion to redheads. If you sleep in the same bed with them, tell them they make noises in their sleep or that they snore, even if they don't. Tell them how much you hate their chosen career, family, friends, clothing, political affiliation, hairstyle, or taste in television programs. Even the most unreasonable person will respond negatively to personal criticism. Don't listen to them if they tell you they can change. Tell them that they cannot, and that it would be too late if they did.

Note that ending a relationship may not be an easy process. Your current lover, despite everything you have done to convince them that you should not be together, may not leave quietly. If this is the case, you will need to resort to different tactics. Some suggestions:

Stop shaving your legs/brushing your teeth/wearing clean clothes.
Come home late, and be evasive about your whereabouts.
Bring your new lover home to meet your old lover. Suggest that the three of you "get together" again.
Tell him that you're gay and that you had just been "trying to be normal."
Disagree with everything he says, even if you actually agree.
Invite annoying family members or friends to your home for extended visits.
Tell him about sexually explicit dreams that you have about his friends/brother/sister.
Make him take you to "chick" movies. Refuse to watch action movies.

There are many tactics that will be successful. Just keep your goal in mind and stick to your guns--you'll be single before you know it!